It's probably time to show some "classiness" on this blog, and what better to do so than sharing some poetry.Leo Sia came across and shared these poetry classics - two-line rhymes from The Washington Post competition. The organizers asked for a TWO LINE RHYME, with the MOST romantic first line, and the LEAST romantic second line.
Caution: Don't read further if you don't have a strong sense of humour. You have been warned :-)
Here are some of the entries ...
1. I see your face when I am dreaming,
That's why I always wake up screaming
2. My darling, my lover, my beautiful wife,
Marrying you has screwed up my life
3. Kind, intelligent, loving and hot,
This describes everything you are not
4. Love may be beautiful, love may be bliss,
But I only slept with you 'cause I was pissed.
5. I thought that I could love no other
-- that is until I met your brother.
6. Roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, and so areyou.
But the roses are wilting, the violets are dead, the sugar bowl's empty & so's your head.
7. I want to feel your sweet embrace;
But don't take that paper bag off your face.
8. I love your smile, your face, and your eyes
Damn, I'm good at telling lies!
9. My love, you take my breath away.
What have you stepped on to smell this way?
10. My feelings for you no words can tell,
Except for maybe 'Go to hell.'
11. What inspired this amorous rhyme?
Two parts vodka, one part lime!
Thanks for this selection, Leo ! Who said Poetry is boring?
However, we're not advising you borrow any of these lines for your next Valentine's Day ;-)
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Rest assured dear, I will love you to death,
ReplyDeleteIf only you get rid of your bad breath.
I am sure there's someone from SJS '76 who is equally creative and can come up with something as good. Come on guys or gals. Show your stuff.
ReplyDeleteIn the dim light I try to hold you close,
ReplyDeletethat's when I see the huge boil on your nose.
Your skin is smooth, your top is neat,
ReplyDeleteBut it's your butt that takes up a double seat.
Anonymous April 14, 2009 11.25 AM entry on 'butt that takes up a double seat'
ReplyDeletecan be a compliment though.
i know a few guys who swears by them...haha...
then there are those who goes for ...ahem 'well endowed at the chest'... i think we all know who by now.
You are my knight in shining armour, my Robin Hood,
ReplyDeleteBut what pleasure can I derive from your premature manhood?
Your are more lovely than a summer's day,
ReplyDeleteBut why on earth must you turn into gay?
Correction, typographical error/apr14, 2:52pm
ReplyDeleteYou are more lovely than a summer's day,
But why on earth must you turn into gay?
Not exactly poetry, but these two sentences are factually similar, but can evoke very different reactions if you say them to your lady love:
ReplyDelete1) Time stands still when I gaze at your face.
2) Your face would stop a clock.
Go figure ...
During courtship, you would say:
ReplyDeleteTime stands still when I gaze at your face.
Years later into the marriage, you will then say:
Your face would stop a clock.
Have you heard the one about a man's life being made up of events related to the Three Rings ?
ReplyDelete* Engagement Ring
* Wedding Ring, and
* Suffering
My darling - charm and sweetness from your every pore does ooze,
ReplyDeletebut that was way before you were hooked on the booze.
My love, my goddess, my lady fair,
ReplyDeleteYou were all that till I saw your six-inch armpit hair.
YOU GAVE ME YOUR LOVE, YOU PROMISED ME YOU'D BE TRUE,
ReplyDeleteTHEN I LEARNT YOU DID THE SAME TO THE BUTCHER, GARDENER AND POSTMAN TOO.
I bless the day you walked into my life,
ReplyDeleteI curse the day you ran off with my wife.
If size matters to your more discerning eyes,
ReplyDeleteThen another I'll find with more accommodating pie.
Nice legs,
ReplyDeleteShame about the face.
Those were lyrics from an old 70s song by The Monks. Also the name of the song itself I think. I swear I didn't make it up !
Wow, looks like we have some real poetic talent in the classes of Form 5 too. Maybe we should have our own competition too. Anyone want to sponser prizes?
ReplyDeleteA bowl of the best Kuching laksa at Foody Goody with a glass of kopi-o peng kau thrown in.*
ReplyDelete*Airticket not included.
where is this Foody Goody?
ReplyDeleteHa ha ha .. i think these shd be call "Sweet and Sour" poetry. Very funny.
ReplyDeleteFoody Goody is just next to Kuching Specialist Hospital in Tabuan Jaya. They sell a huge volume of laksa a day. The prices are steep by Kuching standards. Small is RM4, big is RM5. But worth it cause it tastes sooooo... good. When I eat it, I drink every last drop of the gravy [to my wife's dismay - santan high cholesterol, you know].
ReplyDeleteGeorgie boy, I'll join you for laksa and beer at Foody Goody when I go back. Santan and all. We only live once. On you, of course :-)
ReplyDelete